he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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