Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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