my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
