the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Shame - the story of my life.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
