I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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