There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
