I want to have your abortion
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
we're so committed to being not committed
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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