...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I just forgot I was standing up.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize