why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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