Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
