You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
accomplished twins. life is a go
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
