So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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