can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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