So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I'm too high and old for this...
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
