she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
