i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Randomize
