Why are handjobs necessary in class?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
