I can't watch pbs sober anymore
and you said cock pushups were impossible
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
