Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize