the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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