you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I just had sex on a roof
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
