I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize