the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
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