I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I seem to have left my pride at pride
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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