didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
