my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
