We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
