Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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