David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
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