I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
