Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
