I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Randomize