I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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