I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize