this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
