i would punch a child for taco bell
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
