i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
