dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize