Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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