are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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