Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
