Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
