He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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