Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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