He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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