Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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