I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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