I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
