I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
