He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
No subtext here. People are naked.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
