You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I have fence marks all over my body
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
