any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Randomize
