The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
